“Have you seen Jordan’s Facebook page recently?” my mother-in-law asked over the weekend.
“Not in the last day or so,” I responded, knowing it was probably one day too long based on Bonnie’s question.
I grabbed my laptop and logged onto Jordan’s account, and immediately found the post of interest: “I think my mom hates me. She always takes my $ and won’t give it back, even my charity $. I don’t know what 2 do. I’m so sad.”
Count to ten, count to twenty, feeling my eyebrows inching closer to each other with every throb in my head and beat of my heart. Breathe in, breathe out, fill my lungs and expel with an accompanying “Jordan, get the hell in here right now!”
Jordan came bounding into the room, all happiness and sunshine, until she saw the lovely expression on my face. “What did I do?” she asked, slightly annoyed.
Bad attitude to start with, I thought. “Well, apparently you have done nothing, but I have robbed you of all your money and I won’t give it back. Does that about sum it up for you?”
“It’s true, Mom! You always take my money and never give it back!” she screeched, going from a one to an eleven.
“First of all, we use your money on the mornings when you notify me at 7:10 that you need lunch money as we’re walking out the door. I don’t carry cash and at 7:10 you’re barely ready to leave, let alone to add a pit stop at the ATM and make it to school on time. So, yes, Jordan, we use your money for your lunch and inability to plan ahead.”
“I was really upset, Mom, you keep taking all my money and you’ve been so busy you don’t have time to talk to me anymore. I needed to talk to someone about it, so I posted it to get advice!” The full-court drama press was on.
“Jordan, give me a break,” Jim interrupted. “Mom was too busy? Your mom who is working from home EVERY day? You needed to talk to someone about it, so instead of talking to mom, you chose to post it on Facebook instead? Spare me.”
Jordan tried to crank the drama to Broadway opening night level, repeating the same argument over and over, just getting louder and louder. Neither Jim or I were taking the bait.
“Hand me my laptop, Jordan, and go to your room until further notice,” I instructed. I logged on to her Facebook page and posted the following: “I will not be on Facebook during Spring Break because my mom and dad grounded me for posting my problems instead of just talking to them first. I might get my account back if I learn to be more responsible.”
Jordan is still in Facebook jail, and as her trips to the mall have been curtailed, her embezzling mom has yet to return her cash. Funny enough, she has not had access to her account for more than six days and she has yet to ask about it (although it is Spring Break and all her Facebook friends are actually interacting face-to-face).
There have been a few other incidents where Jordan has crossed the line between private and public matters, and as message postings are instantaneous, even the vigilant viewing of our daughter’s account every twenty-four hours makes damage control near impossible, and simply not worth the risk.
There is quite a good chance that while Jordan will be allowed to play games on Facebook, she will no longer be allowed to visit with others. Her dinosaur and unhip parents will instead only allow for those old-fashioned standbys, email and phone calls. How dorky, right?
Laura, In my opinion FaceBook is a dangerous place to be for children. Even older kids don't always understand what the repercussions might be of what they may say or do. The pre-teen years are hard enough to live through. Let them use the good old fashion phone or email. It's hard to be the parent that says "no" to Facebook, but who knows, you may get a following of other parents that may agree with you and remove their kids from Facebook. It's not always easy to be the parent who starts the crusade. Good luck to you.
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